So we are ambassadors for Christ,
as if God were appealing through us.
- 2 Cor 5:17-21
Sunday and Monday's readings are quite rich and therefore a bit difficult to reflect on. They made me question if I could ever truly be an "ambassador" of Christ; what it would be like to welcome fellow sinners with God's grace; what eternal life and joy would feel like; and how I would feel to have a tangible sign that God is real.
At the heart of all the readings (as in the whole bible), I think there is a play between hope and hopelessness, a sense of God saving us and of us losing sight of His grace. The reflection I read for Monday mentions the bleakness of March, with a question of will summer ever arrive? I was thinking about the sharp contrast in these readings from Sunday and Monday in terms of feeling the joy that only comes from God--pure and eternal--and feeling the sharp desolate nature of being cut off from our Father. Throughout this year, I've romanticized certain periods of my life and victimized myself in the present, all as an attempt to cope. When I think about the joy that awaits me this summer with a much-needed break, I find it difficult to remain energized and joyful now, in the present. When I think about seeing loved ones suffer, seeing sin recur in my actions, and seeing no success where I have planted with hard work, I almost succumb to this sense of hopelessness. I feel so grateful to know that God, however, will not give into that hopelessness. Even when all my actions could and perhaps even should cause Him to lose hope in me, He prevails and continues to make me a better person.
Plant a sense of love, hope, and peace in me, Lord, so that I may share it, as an ambassador, with others.
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